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The MIGHTY FLAME

Updated: May 10



I have a serious flower addiction which I wrote about for Thrive Global. I’m not ashamed of this addiction. It makes what I call the Mighty Flame in my heart (and yes, we all have one) grow. If you could see inside my heart when I am doing my weekly freshening of the flower arrangements around the house, you would probably see a beautiful inferno of love.  

That inferno of love softens the prickly edges of my heart, the parts that get poked by my own or others’ anxieties, the parts that rub up against things the wrong way and cause irritation.  This is a helpful addiction.


It also doesn’t harm anyone else, and it’s a relatively inexpensive habit, since I am only shopping for flowers right now at Trader Joe’s. I don’t ever crash from the high because every single time I look at flowers they fill up my heart, and make that Mighty Flame grow.

My book, Superhero of Love, has an entire chapter on the Mighty Flame for a reason. It’s where all superpowers are born.

What Makes Your Mighty Flame Grow?

When in a situation like this quarantine, it can feel like there’s a lot that can diminish that Mighty Flame.  If I don’t take care of my thoughts when I go shopping, I can return home seriously depleted.  That flame can be dimmed or fortified by thoughts, actions, incoming information, circumstances, etc.  We have to be careful to guard it, and pay attention to what makes it grow.


Many are reporting that gardening and walks in nature make their Mighty Flame grow.  I just interviewed the amazing Rebecca Winn on my Superhero of Love Podcast and her entire book is centered on this theme of how nature heals, teaches and nurtures our hearts.

I am lucky I have dogs that take me on at least one daily walk in nature.  Are you able to get up and out into nature?  If you don’t have furry creatures dragging you out, can you make yourself do it?


Dancing Mighty Flame

Are you dancing more?  I love that my friend Jen Pastiloff is doing a dance challenge – Dork it Out Dance Challenge – to raise money to get food on people’s tables. If you need inspiration go to Instagram and look for #dorkitoutdancechallenge.

I have been dancing in the shower and outside at night where no one can see me. There is something super freeing about dancing in the dark all one under the starry skies.  It makes my Mighty Flame dance!


News and Serving Our Mighty Flames

Whether it’s news about the world’s situation delivered by media or your friends and family’s news delivered one-on-one, news can dim our Mighty Flame.  I am imbibing less and less news every week. I am not clicking on any of the expert plea videos being sent to me by beloved friends because they are not serving my Mighty Flame.

When I spend some time supporting a friend through something hard, I then have to make sure I take care of my heart, by seeing what fear or sadness was brought up in me.

Bumping Up Against Other Hearts

When we bump up against someone else’s heart, there are unhealed places in our own hearts that can be poked or nudged to grab our attention for some additional healing.  If our wounds are recent, there may be freshly formed scabs that get irritated.  It can be as simple as a friend uttering one sentence expressing an anxiety that sends your own heart into a tailspin.

We need to watch our Mighty Flames these days more keenly than ever. 

Taking Care of Your Mighty Flame

Becoming aware of your Mighty Flame is easier than you might think.  You can start right now.  Put your hand on your heart and ask yourself:

On a scale of 1 to 10 how brightly is the Mighty Flame in my heart burning now?


If it is a 10, awesome!  That may mean you are just in a really good place -- or this article did your heart some good!  (If it’s the latter, oh Superhero, please pass it on to a friend!)


If it is less than a 10, keep your hand on your heart – which alone increases your awareness --- and repeat this to yourself until you feel done repeating it:

I am love.  I am loved.

I am love. I am loved.

Check in with your Mighty Flame again.  Are you closer to 10 now?



A Tiny Spark

Dante wrote, “A mighty flame followeth a tiny spark.”

Sometimes just looking at heart-warming photos from the past can be the tiny spark that will make your Mighty Flame grow big and bright.


I watch old movies.  Cary Grant, Myrna Loy and Carole Lombard movies make my Mighty Flame grow.  Old TV shows from the 60’s, 70’s and 80’s make that flame grow: they are simple, happy and resolve conflicts with ease. 

It doesn’t take big moves or motion to find a tiny spark.  What are some of the tiny sparks you have just hanging around in your life waiting to be plucked?

Find Another Heart


Sometimes we need help.  We need someone else to hand us a little sparkler to get our Mighty Flame growing.

Sometimes we need help protecting our flame.  Like when you are lighting a little fire in the middle of a damp, cold forest and you need some extra hands to help protecting the flame from the wind.

Sometimes we need to reach out to another heart to take us out of that dangerous neighborhood between our two ears. 


Don’t be shy, all our Mighty Flames need the love of other hearts, and sometimes it’s just what that other heart needed to be of service to you.

Whatever you can do to make your own Mighty Flame grow is helping our planet right now.  The more loving we can all be right now, the more swiftly we will all heal all the many levels of healing we have yet to complete.

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     bridget@superherooflove.com

    © 2020  Bridget Fonger/Superhero of Love